I have a confession. A deep secret boils in the
caliginous recesses of my mind, and it lures me and torments me
simultaneously. I long to hold it close for the gratification of my
flesh, but I'm even more compelled to let it go in order to protect my
spirit. Never before have I physically felt the war between good and evil
raging the way I do now. In one direction, I hear God gently whisper (I
Kings 19:12) return to me (Joel 2:12) and in the other, a seductive
voice calls out to me from the darkness that is my shadow. Carl Jung
described the allegorical shadow as the "hidden, repressed, for the
most part inferior and guilt-laden personality whose ultimate ramifications
reach back into the realm of our animal ancestors and so comprise the whole
historical aspect of the unconscious...". Until recently, I had
never fully explored mine, at least not intentionally, and as I have begun to
open myself up to its existence, I now know why. For most of my Christian
walk, I've ignored its pull and even denied it, but as Dr. Stephen Diamond said
"The shadow is most destructive, insidious and dangerous when
habitually repressed...". This, I know to be true because once
the restraint has been lifted, sin will undoubtedly ensue. More than once
lately I have been caught in the snare of my own unconscious turned conscious
desires, and like the opening of Pandora's Box, the invitation to the shadow to
become center stage can give full vent to the most gruesome consequences.
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| www.embracetheshadow.com |
What, then shall we say? Should we continue in ignorance of
the shadow's urges? No, we should know full well what it wants that we may be
prepared to give an answer when the time comes (1 Peter 3:15). To be
clear, the shadow is not to be avoided, but embraced for the purpose of
assimilation or integration. I'm not there yet. I'm still
navigating its depths, trying desperately not to fall completely under.
No matter how badly I misstep, however, and I often do, somehow I know that
Genesis 28:15 is true when God says "I am with you and will watch over
you wherever you go." If that wasn't enough, Isaiah 41:13 says "For
I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do
not fear; I will help you." I'm not getting it right everyday, but
when it's all said and done, Proverbs 19:21 says that "many are the
plans in a person's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails."
This, too, I know to be true and as I continue on this journey of exploration
and deeper self awareness as a therapist, I rest on Exodus 14:14 that says I
need only be still for "the Lord will fight" for me. What
confessions do you have and to what or whom does your shadow cry
out? Don't run from it, engage to understand it and let God help you overcome it. (Romans 8:37).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgKry5VYs74
